Having a child in the hospital is full of ups and downs, long-awaited triumphs and dismal disappointments. On one hand, a successful plication surgery and subsequent reinflation of a lung that has struggled for weeks to heal. On the other, a chylous effusion followed by a repeat lung collapse. Up then down. Up then down. I won't lie. Staying even somewhat positive is a constant challenge.
This past week, one of Josephine's hallmates died. It was a little girl, I think. And maybe a transplant patient. We saw her family in the "consultation" room (the same one they took us to after Josephine's first surgery when she began hemorrhaging.) Not a fun place to be. Now, as awful as it feels, I'm grateful... because it could have been us. It could have been our child whisked away to emergency surgery. It could have been our family members crying outside the consultation room. It could have been us making funeral arrangements in the hallway outside the ICU. But thankfully, it wasn't. There's a duality to the situation that is fundamentally mind-numbing. Simultaneously horrible and wonderful. Nothing to do but keep moving and keep praying. And so we do.
Although today is Thanksgiving and being in the hospital isn't exactly how we had originally planned to celebrate the day, we have much for which to be thankful:
A successful plication surgery.
A successful extubation.
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Two working lungs and a plan to come off of ventilatory support.
The removal of all chest tubes, IVs, cardiac lines and pacing wires.
A few beautiful smiles.
Daily opportunities for holding and cuddling.
And six (SIX!) amazing months with our sweet Princess.
We're grateful. To know her and love her, and to be called to comfort her, care for her and help her thrive.
Turkey dinner? Who needs it.
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